World O’ Words: A new meaning to the term ‘Walking Dead’

World O’ Words: A new meaning to the term ‘Walking Dead’

Barry Coulter

“They can bring long dead animals back from extinction, but they can’t grow hair on the top of a bald man’s head.” Barry Coulter

The word of the week is necrofauna — a brand new addition to the word hoard, with immense implications and potential for the future, yet with deep roots in the past, in so many ways I don’t know where to begin.

Necrofauna are animals that were extinct, but have been brought back into the world of the living, through human actions like cloning, genetic reconstruction, cross-breeding, or other fascinating developments on the animal husbandry front. De-extinction, this process is called; another groovy new word.

While its significance is modern, necrofauna’s roots are Greek — the same way we’ve been putting together words for centuries. “Necrofauna” is a portmanteau word (two words jammed together to make a new one) consisting of two morphemes: “Necro,” from the Greek prefix for death, and “Fauna,” Greek for animals of a particular time and place, which also became the name of a Roman goddess for the Earth and fertility.

Woolly mammoths have long been considered the best candidate for de-extinction, and in fact we’re all muttering “necrofauna” to ourselves because we’re on the verge of actually rekindling these pachydermous, with which we humanoids shared the earth for a bit. Mammothus primigenius vanished thousands of years ago, but scientists are now say ing they are on the verge of bringing him back, through a magnificent feat of genetic engineering. Perhaps even within a decade.

Critics are calling out the dangers of de-extinction. Introducing necrofauna, however genetically modified, into an environment profoundly changed since last time, may introduce curious new diseases, causing who knows what widespread havoc.

And there’s a moral issue as well. It’s been determined that we’re on the verge, or even undergoing the sixth mass extinction in earth’s history, in which three quarters of earth’s species could vanish, leaving us to lord it over the Planet of the Weeds. So should we not be using our de-extinction science to protect and help species like the mountain caribou to prosper once more?

I’ve heard the criticism that we humans are actually building an ark — we understand that Siberian tigers, leopard frogs, rhinocerii, blue whales are going the way of the passenger pigeon, while we’ll probably end up trying to save the lions, the bees, bears, elk, and perhaps wolves. So if we’re building an ark, wouldn’t it be unfair to let some species go extinct — the eventual fate of us all — while adding to the population of our ark with “the walking dead,” to coin a phrase?

And really, what’s the point of re-introducing mammoths back into our local biogeoclimatic zones, unless we’re going to hunt them with stone spears and make flutes out of their bones.

We could debate these questions for decades. Personally, I’m a fan of the Upper Paleolithic Period. I think it was a golden age for human species, of which there were several. Once the great ice receded, the climate was great. Food was plentiful. Diseases were relatively few. Our brains were emerging into full power. You could even make the case that humans were more intelligent back then.

Bringing back that time would add a certain frisson to our current time — the late Holocene epoch, or Anthropocene, as some have proposed calling the period dating from the commencement of significant human impact on the Earth’s geology and ecosystems.

I imagine walking out my back door at dawn and instead of shooing away the deer or tripping over the skunks, I am sprung upon by Smilodon Fatalis — a saber-toothed tiger. What an epic way to go!

But enough about digging up the buried past. As a word, Necrofauna has great potential for colloquial usage. “You still here? You some kind of Necrofauna?”

Plus, this word passes another key test with an A-plus — how well it works as the name of a rock band.

“Tonight, on stage at the Old Supervalu Auditorium in downtown Cranbrook — Johnny Morpheme and the Portmanteaux. With special guests Necrofauna.

* * *

Yes, the Word o’ the Day is really paraskevidekatriaphobia , the fear of Friday the 13, which is today. So happy Paraskevidekatriaphobia, everyone. What could possibly go wrong?

* * *

A world-wide Word O’ the Day recently was Dotard. Kim Jung Un’s use of ‘dotard’ to describe President Donald Trump, in response to Trump’s calling Kim “Rocket Man,” certainly had us all chuckling at the use of this ancient word dating back to the Middle English of the 14th Century. It’s now generally considered archaic, not to mention a deadly insult. You don’t refer to anyone as a dotard anymore, you describe them as having dementia, and instead of “dotage” we now use the word “retirement.”

Actually, Kim Jong Un referred to President Trump as “neukdari,” a Korean word which translates better as ‘Old Lunatic.” I thank CNN for this information. I do not know why the English speaking world decided to go with “dotard” instead. Translation is a wonderful science.

Barry Coulter is Editor of the Cranbrook Townsman

Just Posted

Prince Charles Secondary School
School District 8 votes in favour of name change for Secondary School in Creston

In an act of reconciliation, a new name will be chosen for Prince Charles Secondary School

Kootenay-Columbia MP Rob Morrison. Photo courtesy Conservative Party of Canada.
MP Morrison appointed to parliamentary national security committee

Kootenay-Columbia parliamentarian one of five candidates appointed to national security committee

Repaving of Victoria Ave (3rd St. S. to 11th St. S.) began on Monday, June 12. Drivers are asked to please avoid the area for the remainder of the day, if possible. Please watch for and obey directions from flaggers and signage, as the detours will be moving regularly. Photo courtesy City of Cranbrook.
Road construction, repaving programs well underway

Local road construction and repaving work continue apace, as summer programs get… Continue reading

Vendors and customers at one of the Cranbrook markets in 2020. (Corey Bullock/Cranbrook Townsman file)
Cranbrook Farmers Market updates operating hours for the summer

Markets will continue to run from 10a.m. to 1p.m. until October 30th

City council passed first reading of a text amendment to a downtown zoning bylaw that would permit the land use for a craft brewery. Photo courtesy City of Cranbrook.
Downtown zoning amendment allowing craft brewery passes first reading

An application is moving forward that will tweak a downtown zoning bylaw… Continue reading

Maxwell Johnson is seen in Bella Bella, B.C., in an undated photo. The Indigenous man from British Columbia has filed complaints with the B.C. Human Rights Tribunal and the Canadian Human Rights Commission after he and his granddaughter were handcuffed when they tried to open a bank account. THE CANADIAN PRESS/HO-Heiltsuk Nation, Damien Gillis, *MANDATORY CREDIT*
VIDEO: Chiefs join human rights case of Indigenous man handcuffed by police in B.C. bank

Maxwell Johnson said he wants change, not just words, from Vancouver police

Tk’emlups te Secwepemc Chief Rosanne Casimir stands outside the former Kamloops Indian Residential School after speaking to reporters, in Kamloops, B.C., on Friday, June 4, 2021.THE CANADIAN PRESS/Darryl Dyck
Kamloops chief says more unmarked graves will be found across Canada

Chief Rosanne Casimir told a virtual news conference the nation expects to release a report at the end of June

A woman wears a vaccinated sticker after receiving a COVID-19 vaccine at a vaccination clinic run by Vancouver Coastal Health, in Richmond, B.C., Saturday, April 10, 2021. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Jonathan Hayward
B.C. ranks among highest in world in COVID-19 first-dose shots: health officials

More than 76% of eligible people have received their 1st shot

A screenshot of the First Peoples Cultural Councils First Peoples’ Map. (First Peoples Cultural Council)
Online resource blends B.C.-Alberta’s Indigenous languages, art and culture

Advisor says initiative supports the urgent need to preserve Indigenous languages

An artists conception of the new terminal building at the Pitt Meadows Regional Airport.
Air travel taking off in B.C., but lack of traffic controllers a sky-high concern

There will be demand for more air traffic controllers: Miller

Canadian Armed Forces experts are on their way to North Vancouver after a local homeowner expressed worry about a military artifact he recently purchased. (Twitter DNV Fire and Rescue)
Military called in to deal with antique ‘shell’ at North Vancouver home

‘The person somehow purchased a bombshell innocently believing it was an out-of-commission military artifact’

Amy Kobelt and Tony Cruz have set their wedding date for February, hoping that more COVID-19 restrictions will have lifted. (The Macleans)
B.C. couples ‘gambling’ on whether COVID rules will let them dance at their wedding

Amy Kobelt and Tony Cruz pushed back their wedding in hopes of being able to celebrate it without the constraints of COVID-19

A plane is silhouetted as it takes off from Vancouver International Airport in Richmond, B.C., May 13, 2019. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Jonathan Hayward
Report calls for airlines to refund passengers for flights halted due to COVID-19

Conclusion: federal help should be on the condition airlines immediately refund Canadian travellers

Green party Leader Annamie Paul speaks during a news conference on Parliament Hill in Ottawa on Tuesday, June 15, 2021. Paul has survived another day of party strife after a planned ouster shifted course, leaving her with a tenuous grip on power ahead of a likely federal election this year. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Justin Tang
Green Leader Annamie Paul blasts ‘racist,’ ‘sexist’ party execs who sought ouster

Fallout has continued, with two of the federal council’s members resigning

Most Read